Tuesday, June 26, 2007

playing footsie

I've been having some problems with my feetsies ever since I started running again, but I DREADED going to the podiatrist.

The last time I had gone was about five or so years ago, to this guy I used to call "the foot fetish doctor".

He earned his name due to the fact that he was a bit of a perv, and I always felt like he was fondling my feet, and I felt kinda dirty. You know. Sitting in a reclining chair, having an older man fondle my feet while telling me how attractive I am. That's sort of not what's supposed to happen when one goes to the podiatrist, right?

My physical therapist had warned me about this guy, and really, it was kind of funny. He wasn't inappropriate enough to report, and he was a good doctor, ultimately, so what harm was there--he wasn't gross looking either, which definitely made it easier to stomach.

I called his office the other day to make an appointment, but he was booked solid for a month. I don't have a month. I need a doctor NOW. My feetsies hurt! So I went back to the drawing board, and looked up a doctor near work who could see me immediately. THIS time, I chose a woman.

My new podiatrist is around my age, and very cute in a Tina Fey sort of way. I immediately developed a girl-crush on her. She, however, did not fondle my feet or hit on me. I might have been slightly disappointed.

At any rate, towards the end of the appointment she asked me who my old doctor was, and I told her.

Immediately, we both started gushing about what a nice man he is. What a good doctor he is. Then there was a pause.

We both simultaneously looked at each other and started blurting out story after story about this man. How when she was in podiatry school she was told to "watch out" for him, and that if he was in the darkroom developing xrays she shouldn't go in there alone.

She looked relieved when she was done "confessing" these little tidbits to me. We had a good laugh, and then she said "you probably shouldn't repeat what I just told you, huh."

I told her it was a girl-to-girl conversation that needed to be had, and not to worry, it would never be repeated.

Except for on this blog, of course!


Ha Ha Sound said...

Creepy. Doctors should never sexualize their patients.

That said, the hygienist at my dentist's office is this totally hot older Russian woman that I have this crazy desire to take a shower with.

Did I just say that out loud?

The Cajun Boy said...

i think that i have a fucking corn! i have no idea what one looks like, but it MUST look like this thing does. it fucking hurts.

see you at the podiatrist office!

5 of 9er said...

I am a sucker for the Tina Fey cute. And I need a podiatrist. Too bad I'm in Chicago. Crap!

i like cheese said...

haha--the hygienist at MY dentist's office has a crazy desire to take a shower with ME, or something...but that's another blog post.

Caj--EW. Just...ew.

9er--Sucks for you ;)

Hex said...

Somehow I don't think two dudes could strike up a similar momentary friendship if they had matching stories about a creepy urologist.

Except that all urologists are sorta creepy to begin with.

dmbmeg said...

cheesy i need your email address. email me at dmbmeg@gmail.com

eric the beehivehairdresser said...

Cheese... did you start a new blog that I just don't know about yet?