Schwing!

A couple weeks ago, the boyfriend and I were trolling the internet for weird and random things. Somehow, I ended up signing up for one of those “adult finders” websites, in the quest for pictures of scary swingers looking for love.

I myself am not a scary swinger looking for love...but I guess out of sheer boredom I thought it would be a good idea to check out others who were in the market for a little menage a trois action and laugh at the freaky deaky photos that they post of themselves.

I gave a fake name and set up a fake profile—in fact, my profile doesn’t really have much on it, nor do I even have a picture…yet I get email notifications all the time telling me I have mail in my adultfinder inbox. Which says a lot about the people who are on this website to begin with--nice to know that they are so selective that they will email a nameless, faceless Brooklyn gal not knowing a thing about me--I could weigh 500 pounds and have a mule's face for a head, for all they know.

Just the other day I got a notification that I had received mail from "CocoFreak 27", who was nice enough to attach a photo of her large cleavage, clad in a leather bra.

But I digress.

Today my IT guy was sitting at my computer, fixing whatever was wrong with it, and my gmail was nice enough to send me an alert, that pops up right in the corner of my screen, showing me when I get new emails. “ADULTFINDERS—tittyfucker has sent you an email.” Yea. There was no hiding that.

Well. I guess there are worse things than your coworkers thinking that you’re a swinger…right? Maybe it'll earn me some clout in the office.