Me and My Wine

I got home from work tonight a little bit stressed out, with my cell phone ringing off the hook with more work people trying to drain me of all of my blood and other bodily fluids. I sat down on my couch and poured myself an innocent glass of wine, and lo and behold...3 hours later, here I remain, 3/4 of the bottle missing. Missing I tell you! Where did those beautiful golden droplets go? I fear they may be sitting in the bowels of my tummy, but oooh how much fun it was while it was going down!

Some things that I've learned this evening, while chillin' with my homey, Talus Chardonnay {which, I will admit, I completely stole off of my ex-assistant's desk while leaving the office tonight. It had been sitting there for a while, and I decided that no one was going to miss it. oops}.

-Kashi Mediterreanean Frozen pizza..the nutritional info indicates that there are three servings in the box. I don't THINK so!

-I post super long, well thought-out comments on others' blogs while under the influence. Life-changing stuff--if I happened to give you any advice tonight, you should listen!

-Never Been Kissed. What a great movie. Oscar worthy! Michael Vartan. Yummy..wanna slurp up with a spoon. Do they give Oscars for extreme hotness?

-I can conduct a conference call, from my couch, after two glasses of wine. And sound way more professional than my every day me. So sad. But true.

-If I squint, I have the same profile as Mr Roper on Threes Company

-My cat really likes it when I sing Hole songs in falsetto. He thinks I am in heat and starts to hump my leg. Horny ass cat. Just like his momma.

-I created a new dessert for desperados too drunk and tired to go to the supermarket for REAL ice cream--take a blue bunny cookies n cream popsicle, nuke it for 1O seconds to make it nice and gushy. Cover with Redi Whip originally purchased for naughty sex games, sprinkle with chocolate syrup ALSO purchased for said sex games, yet somehow always gets used for actual dessert situations. Hardcore chocoholics can sprinkle choc chips on top...you know, the ones that were bought to make Christmas truffles with, but that now just sit in the cupboard waiting for moments like this.

-I really do enjoy date night with myself at home. It's been a while since I've had one, and damn, do I treat myself good!