I Don't Remember, I Don't Recall

I've always been kind of ditzy, in the sense that I have a touch of ADD and can't focus. It's got its charm, I suppose, giving me just enough of a quirk that I get by, and it's not entirely annoying.

Lately, however, it seems that my ADD has morphed into full blown dementia, and it's freakin' me out, man.

The other day, I left my sister a voicemail along the lines of "Hey, I haven't talked to you since you came back from your trip, gimme a call."

To which she replied, "Are you on fucking drugs? I talked to you for an hour and a half last Sunday, and told you all about my trip. So glad I'm that compelling that you don't REMEMBER???"

I seriously couldn't recall the conversation that we had, although after she mentioned it, I racked my brain and dug up the recollection from the dregs of my failing mind.

The other day, I couldn't remember if I'd put in a tampon. I mean, for fucks sake, how hard is that to remember? Either I did, or I didn't. But no...I went to pull one out so I could jam another one in, fished around for a string, and found none. panic ensued. Did I lose the string? Was I going to have to reach into my hooha and do a search and rescue mission?

I chose to believe that I never put one in to begin with. So hopefully it's not swimming around my uterus somewhere.

I woke up this morning feeling all sorts of shitty, and thought back to my night before.

Two dirty martinis, a Blue Bettie, and 2 glasses of Chardonnay.

Oh my God, the alcohol is eating my brain.